Been a few days i didn't update le...tired...n no mood...haiz...latest updates,change a new hp...samsung d830...funny y i suddenly use samsung...dunno...i'm downgrading... i bought from my bro...at least the money goes back to my family...still ok la..my phone now more like a phone... not suitable to hear mp3, onli 2 mp...i dunno i change for wat...like the design onli ba...anyway...haiz...
Been late for work recently...heard going to get black listed...no wonder this week schedule so empty...8 shift... next week 9 shift...feel like giving up...just fuck off n go find another job...but can i just fuck off like tt?cannot wat...bo bian,have to face the problem...always tell myself have to wake up early but cannot... wat's the problem?am i tt not capable?a wrong choice to even trust myself?no...i have to admit...not alot of ppl can hold their body till now...wat happen inside me i dun wanna say anymore becos dun wan others to worry liao...but i know my body well...i'm late just becos i not enough sleep,tt's all...since my body cannot, then use my brain loh... sleep early then i can wake up le wat...since dunno when i encounter this problem,but just dun wan to accept the fact tt this is the onli way to solve it...my fault again...learn new things,face the fact...dun escape from problem...
Been having a conflict with ppl at work...someone say tt part timer always call full timer to do things...by saying so get himself into shit...none of my business...but who is the part timer?think it's me...smile smile in front of me like nothing happen...ok u r a captain,dun care whether u new or old,since u hold ur position so strong tt even following a request from a part timer in order to fullfill the team work tt is needed also will disgrace u, then fine,just let me know early...i respect ur rank...but keeping quiet will onli bring us to the situation tt u have look at me n say i'm no one to 'order' u to do things... fine... i can understand... g/h is not so simple, u dunno who will back stab u...i'm standing at ur point of view...so,from now on, u give orders i obey...ok?dun worry about emotion,it won't hurt a bit...cos i onli take u as my collogue,or my superior...
Been having another conflict with another higher superior...this case abit funny...not going to mention who...she's the one tt i scare n hate most in g/h...2 years ago y i leave also becos of her... ah nvm... wan me do fast i do fast, then kanna fuck,say wat i doing is not according to SOP...if i not wrong is Standard Operation Procedures... then wat...in front of so many captains give me the shit...nb...this kind of ppl study too much, know how to work dunno how to 'zuo ren'...or maybe she just wanna aim me...i escape 2 years ago...now i face it...i still greet her as normal,try to do watever she wan...u say i'm not following the SOP,then do u fucking let me touch the SOP?i dun even know how tt book looks like...fine,nvm,i put myself even lower...learn from the basic n follow everything...u know y i have to do untill this stage?becos i got my plans...if this stage i cock up, then the adjustment for my plans all the way to my 50 years old birthday will be terrible...wtf...just joking...just tt i have to follow my plans, n i believe this is a way of learning...i know they r some wat making use of me...i'm making use of them anyway...just b4 they r useless to me,i must stay there...ah.... the funny thing is here... doing some stuff at the basin at back area...then when i turn over i elbow her...erm,some where tt is very sensitive...n in my life,first time i recognise her as a female...nbcb...nvm...say sorry then move on...after tt clear up back area,then c a high ball glass of water...erm...whose?dun care, clear...but abit thirsty,take a clear look got ppl drink b4 anot...no lipsticks mark...tt means maybe a guy one... aiya fuck care,dun waste water...just b4 tt i ask xiwen whose is tt...he say dunno...just when i take a big sip,he came n tell me it's her's....knnbccb...too late...the next thing i know she's somewhere near...faster pour away,then k siao ask her, issit her's...then refill for her n fuck off quickly... haiz...fuck sia... going to rot already...haiz...so sway...
Been toking about stupid things for the past few paragraph...haiz...my life is stupid...eve been calling me recently...one is a few days ago when i'm sleeping...another is today...i'm working...asking me when i finish work...she's somewhere near my place...keke...told her 4pm,n i cannot help...haiz...she's like nothing happened like tt...a few weeks ago still like going to kill me like tt...in the whole world,think she's the onli one tt can make me so miserable...have to admit... i lose like no body business this time...i didn't lost anything except for someppl tt i love...it's enough...enough to take away my smile...sorry,eve,didn't told u this on the phone...if u say u gonna wait for me i would say i may have OT...if untill 12 o'clock u say u still wanna meet me,i will say i not at home, i'm at yishun, so even u come my house also cannot find me...sorry,didn't tell u straight...dun wan to c u...not becos i still hate u,not becos i dun wan to pay u back the money,just becos....my wound still hurts...maybe for life...so hope u just concern when i pay u back the money, take the money use it happily with yao rong then good le...just leave me alone...i dun wan to cry infront of u again...my tears r same as me...worthless...
Been emo-ing again...let's talk about some k-po things...read her blog just now...M____...haha felt tt she very ke lian....aiya...dun think so much...pls stand in ur mum's point of view...she's caring for u onli loh...singapore is safe but it's not crimeless loh...maybe u kanna this kind of things is 1 out of a billion times,but as a parent will still be scare as long as there is a possibility...somemore scare u go outside learn bad things...nowadays bad guy in disguise alot loh...n she's not purposely aiming ur bf also loh...u got bring him home ma? maybe she still abit old ppl thinking just like my mum la,but u have to comprimise ma,in the sence of standing at her point of view n explain to her...told u liao,mature this kind of things is very important...my point of view is as long u think properly b4 u do then consider mature liao...did u think properly?did u think of her point of view?late back home do u know how she feels?especially u r a gal...my mum worst ah...told her i will come back 1am, when i was like 20 years old?she still sit down there wait for me,like scare i kanna rape like tt...haha making me guilty...next day she still have to wake up at 5...so is like think about their feelings ba...hp low batt then must be careful,either bring a extra batt or charge full b4 u leave house n use it lesser,so ur bill also lesser...at least she can contact u,somehow she feels safer ba...
Haha tell u ba...to ur mum,u r a gal tt still likes to play...this is the fact isn't it?play is not wrong...up to wat extend n must c play wat...the best way is just prove urself mature...let them know u r studying well...make them know u know how to use ur money...as long they think u becoming mature,then they will have more confidence tt u will take good care of urself....then slowly will give u more freedom le wat....same as u go outside work..interview tt time, working tt time...ur superior will give a task to someone tt is childish ma?cheerful n childish is 2 different thing...u can be mature n cheerful in the same time u know?haha dun think so much...u r a clever gal...i know...
I'm the one tt think too much...none of my business right?dunno she read my blog liao will fuck me upside down anot...haha after reading her blog i found myself is the no life ppl tt she mention...today after work do wat? go into my room on com,then lie on bed awhile then i knock out le,then 8 plus wake up do wat?go makan,then go buy bread then come back use com le...after this?go bath then sleep again...the most b4 i sleep watch anime...haha...super no life...better dun get close to others life...told myself le...dun get too close into other ppl's life le...nvm, i'm just busybody...