Chapter C: Don't ask the past
Friday, October 26, 2007
Don't ask me,y i didn't reply ur msg...dun ask me,y i didn't give u tt last chance...dun ask me,y i know u r no longer working with me n i dun even care...dun ask me,y i nvr ever concern u all anymore...dun ask me,y i can become so cruel...u know the answer dun u? so,pls dun question about wat is already past...as i already left wat is past as past...so do u...accept the cruelity of fate,as i already accept tt n i am the performer now...as i,already be a passer by in ur past...in no time,the foot steps of mine will definately fade,just like my once deep foot steps living in their heart...dun ask...cos u r the one,who trigger tt in my heart...just to let u know tt my heart is still alife,living fully in another person's world...perhaps history will once again happen,but...i am ready to accept the fruit i once planted...the retributions...
Chapter LILIX: ESPADA AGRIETADA
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
" CRACKED SWORD" in spanish
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Wat have i done again...the history repeats...this time round,zero guiltiness felt...so,i change huh? change into a hollow...nope...i just know wat is right n wrong...like wat i said,there's nothing good or bad isn't it?no matter which side wins,i still wins...but winning now may not be forever...will i get the retribution?who cares...i am just living the way i wan it to be...
This bet,most likely i already win more than half of it...n u should know ya,i dun take chance...so i'm always prepared...so wat i lose?still doesn't realli affects me...so wat,times up?i will still retrieve...beating me,not a chance... lastly,may i wish,the clouds to betray the blue sky...
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¿Pero qué es esta pena en el corazón? Apenas cambiar en una ESPADAS, yo no puedo conseguir el uso del es... O soy yo mal... ¿Hay todavía un sentido poco humano en mí? Quizás... Pero aún mi máscara agrietó delante de ella, yo me siento todavía que este juego es digno... Por eso yo digo hay todavía un sentido poco humano en mí...
Chapter LILVIII: Force Kiss
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Again,2 of them r fighting for wat they wan...either of them will benefit me if they get to the aim...but,in the end,i did wat i can do,i just wanna ask her..."Are u MY DEAR?"
Chapter LILVII: I hate CANDY
Monday, October 15, 2007
Ooops...ppl tt is reading this dun anyhow think orh...i hate candy is becos i eat too much liao...there is a menthos box in my working place greeter stand...for guest to eat one...but 90% is staff eat one...n i eat alot also loh...cos will make me more awake...n becos of alot of reason i am damn tired during work,therefore i eat menthos is like one after one...scare kanna diabetes,so i try to control...but already become a habit...untill today,found tt tooth abit shaky liao...dunno which one la...something's not right...faster go home brush teeth...scare leh...long long time nvr drop teeth liao...just nice 10 years...remember the last teeth drop at HK...haiz...i dun wanna drop teeth...i have to quit candy le...no quit eating candy...hehe...
Chapter LILVI: Rise of the MACHINE
Saturday, October 13, 2007
Wa shit...today work 7000's...very very funny...remember hari raya eve 2005,i n ting went zouk to chiong,tt time i wanna fall down also cannot fall...cos too crowded...n today at work,like damn slow loh...worst then last week's friday loh...(i got work anot ah?) but confirm not very slam la...i still can stone for more than 3 mins each time means realli very quiet liao...talk cock with wani,nagen,danny...still can go runner side fight with hui yun...haha,violent gal...dun play too rough...scare one day she will kick my cock...haha small gal la...i purposely grab a oval tray n put a side...control the guest,let them dun feel like going,prepare enough roll up n side plates,then start to 'chase' them off...hehe...dun ask me how,i got my way...n it always work for singaporean...ya la...tt's y i dun mind the turn over rate slow...cos also no tips one...i still can do excellent service,i need to,to perform my "stuck their ass on the chair"technique...hehe...if my service do well,they will stay...keep pouring ice water loh...nothing wat...just pour loh,then when i'm ready,then stop...keep clearing their things away...tt will be a obvious change which they can feel...then they normally will start to bill...then bill liao,c empty glass dun refill,just clear...unless they still wan la...then they feel like nothing to do liao,then they will soon finish their topic with their friends...n soon they will feel their ass pretty pain after sitting so long at tt stupid metal chair,then they will move liao,once they move,take a oval tray go their table,put all the things n carry one time back to side station...by tt time i carry oval tray to their table,won't have much left liao la...so less than one min or so,the whole table will be anew...hehe...so basically with this technique,really won't get slam one loh...
But got one time realli very sway...take the condiments setting onto a new table,then the most easiest drop object drop on the floor,n everything splash on me n i cut my arm...sway sway it's tt tall n light tabasco...tt red liquid go in my wound loh...T_T honestly,it's damn pain loh...worst than qing chao you...even outside of the wound also pain...my neck kanna also pain...the blood come out none stop,deejay c liao also scare...have to find ppl to help me put handy plus la,if not blood keep dripping,so i find her loh...erm....today realli very relax,got a bad feeling.....scare this one is the peace b4 the storm leh...erm,lucky i still got time to rest...erm...tml then say la...now let's get into the topic...
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"Life is like a movie,everybody are actor n actress,noone can be absence...
But everyone can choose to be a human or a machine..."
William Shakespeare
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Haha Shakespear again...hehe another of my idol...heard this on radio when i am at ryan n daniel house at jb...eh,i can remember very well neh...erm these words,quite true la...i tot my heart was dead...no feelings to ppl tt i should have feelings...till tt night...this cheerful gal cries...i dun feel heartache,i just feel tt i should cheer her up...y?dunno...i dun like her in tt sence,just a good buddy to me...but she realli cry like waterfall loh...tot my heart was dead...but y?it's my brain,tt cannot take wat i did...cannot take wat around me happens...tt's y i declare dead...realli wanted to become a machine...but my heart is shaking...just wanna do something stupid to cheer her up...wanted to scold her,but i just can't...she's not tt strong...wanna tell her,dun be a pathetic main character in her life...there is things tt she did wrong also...cry can nvr settle anything...but,i just cannot...at my work place...there's realli alot of things happened...alot of ppl also happy...alot of ppl gossip around...but,i actually should be the one tt is sad...but i'm not now...past experience had already built me up...n anyway,i just temporarily be a machine,tt can earn money n learn lotsa things...n watch their show...some maybe laughable,some may need my knowledge to help them...some may need my care...now i realise...it's the heart...my heart tt can't be change...i always wanna say,i'm born evil,but i can't...of cos i'm not even born angel,cos,noone is...now i onli can say,i have a evil mind in a angel heart...sorry abit boosting,but i just felt so...the things i did,sometimes realli amaze me...sometimes indeed disappoint me...cos i'm still too weak la...b4 i can let ppl not to disappoint me,i should not disappoint myself,i must be strong...i c my aim...dun dare to hope much,but i will try my best...n my fate...i will just let it be...n dun lie to myself anymore...
Chapter LILV: Le Démon du Monde Différent
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Quelque chose duper super stupide arrivé aujourd'hui au travail. ..actually était une plaisanterie, mais une personne de tt de pisse de. ..somemore est le directeur. ..this shiok de temps. ..dunno wat arrivera prochain, ne sais pas y il peut être si chaud tempéré d'un soudain. ..we souvent plaisanterie autour de wat. ..now je n azrol dans la merde profonde. ..but semble je suis dans la merde plus profonde que lui, le cos que je suis n onli si junior une partie pathétique Des autres, pas onli de la princesse. ..i peut dire que je me suis senti si quand je commence à savoir pour parler. ..i toujours a senti tt que je suis dans le monde différent. ..now je sais quand grandi augmente, ceci est wat il a l'air de... A demandé une réponse de la princesse, me mettant hier dans une situation de 50-50...tt moitié de moyens sera heureuse. ..but il confond plus que je le bambin. ..i'm tt plus craintif la réponse est oui, le cos il y aura un grand changement dans la vie, n peut-être je suis toujours incapable de casser le mur entre nous. ..thinking pour le jour entier, n je le glutamate elle au milieu, n que j'ai senti Importuner du temps de gaspillage. ..i'm bien, mais la c'est. ..since j'ai voulu qu'elle ait été heureuse si beaucoup de, alors juste baiser de. ..just comme comment je baise de des autres. ..good assez. ..like veille de wat r dit tout vrai. ..but désolé, je wanna calme gaspille la ressource de cette terre, parce qu'il m'a laissé le c la merde de ce monde... Et d'un soudain j'ai changé. ..back à la maison je commence à regarder des autres écrivent blog. ..those je souvent c dure le temps. ..surprised me suis UN__...she a fait finalement wat elle les réseaux globals. ..n elle finalement met à jour son blog. ..ke...others pas beaucoup de choses. ..some choses enfantines stupides sur leur blog, que j'ai senti extrêmement normal. ..then je vais la vue son blog. ..both...reflected quelque chose. ..how beaucoup d'amour d'u, peut égaler combien l'u Les amours me dure le temps. ..reasons bon pour moi marcher en bas ce chemin. ..this direction... La princesse, la fin d'histoire avec l'u.. je realli ne sais pas comment l'u se sent, nvr d'u de cos dit. ..i toujours a voulu réconforter le coeur d'ur si possible, mais can't...cos nvr d'u dit. ..i dit l'u comment je sens me fait je pas ? n fait l'u véritablement profondément du coeur d'ur se sent comment je me sens ? j'importune realli pense si. ..the dure l'hasard que je dit hier que je déjà donné à l'u il y a longtemps. ..she En haut. ..cos c'est vraiment trop stupide pour continuer. ..but si dans le coeur d'ur, l'u se sent comment je me sens, n wanna ranime wat est mort, aller de l'avant. ..i ne peut rien promettre. ..all ceci peut sembler des déchets à u. u. ..but me permets de dit juste wat je le réseau global. ..i séparera definately un jour. ..if u importune l'ennui de wanna plus, alors juste oublier de moi. ..i importune le contact de wanna n'importe qui. Adieu...
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Combien j'ai aimé ce monde ? Les égaux à combien je le déteste... Si j'ai le pouvoir, je détruirais ce travail désagréable de dieu... Mais je suis juste un homme normal, donc, j'habiterai juste sur, prendre quoi que je peux prendre, remplir mon propre plaisir. ..People autour de moi, j'espère juste que vous tous soit mort... Personne d'entre vous est important à moi... Je vous tous maudis...
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Chapter LILIV: Because of you...
Saturday, October 6, 2007
Recently always hear this song around...dunno by who,forget liao...but is a nice song... i dun even know how to sing la,but someone long ago in my life like it...i tried to find tt time,but can't find,n i didn't really put in tt effort to get it...kinda regret half a year ago,but dun realli give a damn now...erm,just a nice song...
Haiz,recently very tired of work...nothing tired about work itself...i dunno tired of wat...muscle cramp is of cos de,cos tt day play badminton too xiong already...not onli me la,everyone got play also...haiz...wednesday felicia mood swing...swing untill i very frustrated...think she pms ba...women...haiz...tt's wat i like...haha...but nvr give warning one...especially her...temper damn bad...suddenly can come n disturb me,joke with me,suddenly fuck me up,n show me tt stupid face...tt moment i nvr think of the possibility she pms,so i damn fucking du lan...wanna cry already...one more push onli i going to take off my apron i guess...lucky...dun give a damn la...told myself the next day...my purpose is to work n get paid...nothing else is going to concern me...u scold me cos i nvr do my work properly,then tell me how to work properly,i'm not so stupid tt i can't reach the level u wan ba...u scold me for nothing i will just keep quiet n go to work after u have finish ur nonsence...cos i still wan the job,i can't spoil my plan again...u wanna joke with me,i can...i can be very friendly at times...but once u turn n fuck me again,i will just be the same...u can call me moroon or bu dao wong,i dun care,tt's the best way to survive i guess...i have to...
I found tt there is something wrong with me again...always got something wrong one la,i not perfect...erm,i haven't use my brain enough...haiz,cannot like tt...cannot just becos i scare my head grow bigger then dun use my brain fully...hehe,it's just tt,working hard n working smart,i am working too hard compare to smart...not in the sence of at work,it's overall in earning money...there is still lots of way to gain money besides working alone...no matter how hard i whack no matter how many jobs i take,my income is still just able for me to survive...every month i can onli save around 500...if i use it to return my money to my family,i have nothing left...investments i need a bigger some of money...if i start saving now,maybe a year or so,i can use it easily,but the money i owe is too much loh...by working like tt i dunno need how long...time is the essence...therefore,i need more informations n lobang to built up my money...at the same time cut down my expences...n,i dun have anymore time for my emotion to take over me again...
Say is like tt say la,but due to my artistic DNA,i tense to be more emotional...n recently also found tt i like some thing tt is very funny one...i found tt i like opera...not chinese opera,it's those ang mo one...erm,will talk more about tt in next chapter...hehe...
Because of you,i tried so hard to make myself numb...because of you,i for a long time i didn't sleep well...because of you,i turn myself into a painless creature....because of you,i tried so hard to escape my fate...because of you,there is no more colour in my world...all because of you...you know who r u i'm talking about?good night...
Wednesday, October 3, 2007
Haha just came back home,from JB!!! almost one year nvr go liao... those sway things happened again...when i reaching check point,i found tt i lost my passport!!!then found it,on the middle of the road..heng or sway ah?i always like tt one...haiz...meet up with felicia darling at toa pa yoh,then meet stephen at check point...then meet ryan at JB,go eat bak ku teh,then buy racket...haha they all plan to have a badminton game at JB loh...i wonder y dun play in singapore,purposely go JB...then go ryan house meet up with daniel,then go stadium...wth...go stadium play ah,then meet up with azrol at stadium,he with ramu,then lemonh come...ended up in lakin,which i totally dunno how to go home liao...haiz...we realli like tournament loh...all play untill so serious...think i realli dunno how to play...the rules ah,quite complicated...i keep on loosing...untill the last match,i n azrol,lemonh with ryan then we win...hehe...quite tiring n fun...but a sad thing is,i throw my slippers at JB rubbish bin...cos they say will get scoldings if we dun wear shoe,so i wear slippers n play loh...in the end becos wanna save a ball then my slippers break...haiz lots of memories in tt slippers...i still remember who bought it n where he bought...soon have to buy a new one...
In JB,pretty different from singapore...how the car move especially...haiz,also have lotsa memories there...erm...haiz...time flies...chit chat with felicia quite alot today...she got one bad point,is she very big mouth,like to say rumours,just hear loh...she should know none of her business ba...heard her saying R n J's rumour,abit surprise...nowdays youngsters...not young le loh...haiz,y can't things be more simpler,she said...ya,y...y things always so contridicting among human?ya there's good n bad like i say,but can't make everything smooth ma...i had finally think through,things seems smoother,but i'm not living in a world alone...ya, i also talk to azrol about the personal thing i wanted to tell him...from his reply n reaction...i finally know y he say i look like his past,my character n thinking,n my working attitude...i know liao...ya,there is confirm more than me n him in this world who suffer this pain b4...there's alot more...n this is the path he chooses...i should choose my path too...we r a like but not the same...i have to choose my own path...n i know where to go,c it,just abit blur...
Remember ever once i go shopping with my sis at marina square,very early where shops haven't all open yet...we saw this accesory shop,selling necklace n ear rings,n she chooses a very simple design ear ring,n i choose a very complicated design necklace...she say,she dun like things to be complicated...but in my eyes,i like things tt look very complicated,but actually it's just simple...tt necklace is made up of onli 2 metal,but look like quite alot of metal piece chain together...it's actualli a very simple design...this shows my character...in this world everything seems so complicated,but actualli it's damn simple...it's human tt wanna c it in a complicated way...like azrol's problem,like my problem,like princess's problem...all r just so simple...at the first sight maybe very complicated...but think carefully,it's alot of distraction cluster around a single straight line...this is wat i c...dun fuck care the distractions,just concentrate at the line...tt is ur choice which one is the line u determines...every line is a way out...just which one u choose...u know very clearly which one leads where,but becos of the distractions,u r just making urself tough...it's just a simple thing...
Haha,quite enjoy today's outing..hope could have more...just notice,the 3 outing i go out with so far with my working place ppl...the first time is with allen,sue to suntec...second time is sue,ridzwan,felicia to orchard watch movie...now is with all these guys....erm....y all full timer ah!!! like onli i one part timer leh...sooo funny...still got one time i n stephen onli,tt one even best...dunno y leh...haha...maybe i more close with full timers...onli 3 time,had supper with those part timer youngsters after work...hoho...so funny...er,they also not very young la,just 1 or 2 years younger than me...think i realli more n more old liao...haiz...old stubborn...
Have to accept this pathetic fate of mine...ya,stop making ppl i love sad...sorry...accepting fate,definately have good n bad too...i accept it for good...
Monday, October 1, 2007
"There is nothing either good or bad,but thinking makes it so..."
William Shakespeare
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"这世上并没有好与坏,一切是各人想法所造成的..."
威廉姆.莎士比亚
Yeah,new blogskin...this is the game tt is going to launch dunno when by PS3...oohh...wanna play so much...c the preview already realli attracts me...both of them,final fantasy XIII n final fantasy versus XIII...hoho...feel like buying PS3 liao...haha think onli...dun realli go buy...save money...
The headline is the headline i saw in the starting of versus XIII preview...inspired me about the problems i met so far in life...realli ma...there is good or bad,right or wrong...his point of view is an artist point of view...of cos he will say so...but tt's the fact ba...i go think about everything...there is good or bad loh...just tt how am i going to accept it myself...sometimes things happen out of my imagination n expectations...but doesn't mean it's pure bad things...it's whether i wanna accept it tt way anot...if i can't accept it tt way,there must be a problem...of cos,b4 accepting it,i must try to make it the way i wan...but if i realli cannot,then nvm,i should learn how to accept it in a good way...n even now,in the stage tt i could onli accept,it's consider bad to me,but maybe tt changes will make things better or even it maybe the situational ideal case?nobody knows...but it's good tt i finally think through this...
So overall just leave an open mind,things may not turn out tt bad...n even so,it may not really a bad thing from another point of view...just ai zhai,rest well n carry on with my aim...as long as alife,thing normally will turn out good...n anyway,even death itself may not be something bad u c....haha time to sleep again...later finally start work after a long time of off days...sian is the bad thing...but earning money n moving my body after slacking so long maybe a good thing after all...tt's y princess always tell me to stay positive...:)
